According to Pew Research, 55% of women believe dating is harder today than it was 10 years ago. Two troubling reasons why: 57% of women report experiencing harassment on dating apps, and 19% say they’ve even been threatened with physical violence.
Many associate online dating with some shady websites that only dirty-minded people would go to for a quick hook-up with no strings-attached. Some are of the view that dating apps make it easier for a person to paint a false image. In recent times, love scams have also become more widely heard, with internet love scams in Singapore costing victims $33.1 million in 2020 (The Straits Times, 29 Jan 2022).
As people may find it harder to meet others socially or romantically especially during the pandemic, their desire for companionship and connection with a significant other may make them easy prey to fraudsters out there.
That said, we are of the view that there is nothing inherently wrong or “less holy” with online dating. The odds of meeting someone online is probably similar to meeting a romantic interest at work or at a hobby-group/ cell group. It is what we do with the budding friendship or relationship and the discernment we bring with us that matters, not how you meet one another. After all, wolves in sheep’s clothing can lurk in the “unlikeliest” of places – in a church, in a humanitarian group etc.
What is crucial is taking the time to get to know the other person, his/her family as well as friends – and that surely cannot be limited to merely “online” interactions. In any dating relationship, we have also found it helpful not to depend just on our own judgment (as the heart is deceitful above all things – Jeremiah 17:9). At each step of the way, invite wise counsel in the form of family members, close friends and trusted mentors to share their perspectives. Above all, pray! We trust that He is the best teacher – surpassing all the best dating guides out there:)
